Feed the beast!

First, the recipe:

Ingredients:

1/2 cup dry jasmine rice (Yes you can use regular white rice but why on earth would you do that if you can use jasmine?)

1 cup broth, vegetable or chicken — your choice, and you can even use Better Than Bouillon. The choice is all yours! (Pro tip: don’t buy this from Amazon because, holy shit, Batman, who pays $34 for 4 jars of bouillon when you can buy it at Walmart for $3.79 a jar?)

1/4 cup unsalted butter

15-ounce can black beans, rinsed well. You can use any bean you want. I’ve made this with black, red, black-eyed Susan, and lentils. And, if you’re feeling particularly homey and have loads of extra time to spend on boring things, you can buy dry beans and soak them and cook them yourself. Either way, you’ll need 15–16 ounces of ready-to-use beans

3 cloves garlic, peeled and chopped finely. I say 3 cloves, but I usually use 5 or 6. Everyone knows you measure garlic with your heart, not a recipe.

1/4 teaspoon of garlic salt because extra garlic is always good. (see above)

1 teaspoon dried parsley, or 1 sprig fresh, roughly chopped

2 pinches of toasted dried onion

Everything Bagel Seasoning (because why not add more garlic and onion?)

Method:

1. Using a fine mesh strainer, rinse jasmine rice under a running tap for a few seconds. Add rice to a 2-quart or larger pot with a lid. Cover with broth and add 2 tablespoons of butter. Bring to a boil on the stovetop, cover the pot, then turn down the heat to simmer for 20 minutes.
2. While the jasmine rice is cooking, use the strainer to drain and rinse the beans, and while the beans are draining, chop the garlic and fresh parsley, if you’re using it.
3. Heat remaining butter in a skillet just until it starts sizzling. Add garlic and garlic salt. Cook garlic until fragrant and tender, 2–3 minutes.
4. Add beans and cook for 5–6 minutes. Add rice, reduce heat to medium, cover, and cook for 5 more minutes.
5. Spoon out however much you want, (it’s okay with me if you eat it all, little one) sprinkle with parsley, a pinch of dried onion, and a wee bit of bagel seasoning.
6. Enjoy. Seriously, I won’t tell anyone if you eat it all. All the other people in your house? Screw ’em. I mean, you taught them to cook, didn’t you?

As always, the links noted in this recipe are not affiliate links. I do not make coin for your purchase. Those links are for reference. Sometimes you need a visual, ya know?

Notes

• Use your beans and rice as a side dish for dinner, or for a filling lunch. Hell, I’ve had it for breakfast on many an occasion. Because yes, I’m weird that way.
• Add soy sauce or Hunan sauce if you’d like. In fact, you can add whatever seasoning makes your little heart happy. It’s the beans and the rice that make this a filling dish. Dress it up with your favorite flavorings, whatever your particular taste buds like.
• Seriously, if you haven’t tried jasmine rice, stop what you’re doing and go get some on the double. You won’t believe how fragrant it is. It makes your entire house smell fab. Until you cook the garlic, anyway.
• Don’t stress over the butter in this recipe. If you’re vegan or just trying to watch calories or whatever it is that the experts tell us to watch this week, use olive oil (please, by all that is holy, make sure it’s real olive oil. Olive oil fraud is a real thing, so use your brain and give your family the best. I get mine at Amazon.) I’ve also used sesame oil and avocado oil in this recipe. Really, it’s your choice, just don’t skip the oil because it makes a world of difference in your final dish.
• I use organic whenever I can. You might call me a weirdo. It’s okay, I don’t mind at all. I’m especially adamant about organic garlic, but I’ll squawk about the beans, too. We don’t have time to get into it in this article, but eating organic as much as possible comes as close to real, wholesome, and safe as Mother Earth intended. I understand that price may be a factor, so many of us have to pick and choose our food battles, but I’ll battle on the organic hill in the food war, thank you very much.

That’s about it. Hope you try my Fried Beans & Rice recipe and I hope you’ll give me your opinion in the comments!.